I am a single 23 year-old woman and normally I have no problem being single, or being me, but currently, I am watching Bridget Jones Diary and I'm struck by how in society it is not ok to be single. Or maybe struck by how much people don't want to be single.
The entire movie - and lets face it every other chick flick out there in the world, is about NOT being alone, about FINDING your ONE true love, and about living happily ever after.
Don't get me wrong, I am not one of those bitter women who have given up on men and have resigned to being a spinster, hating young couples for the rest of my life. I definitely believe in true love, soul mates, and happily ever after. The problem I have is that society has made it out to be that if you're not dating someone, married etc then in some aspect you're a failure - ESPECIALLY if you're a woman.
Why is that?
Shouldn't the main focus of your life be you?
I realize that sounds entirely selfish, but I mean, this is your life, why should people spend it worried about being single instead of doing something awesome with themselves.
I feel like if we all spent less time worried about catching a man (or woman) and more time thinking about ourselves and the world, then the rest will fall into place because by being you, you're putting yourself out there for the world to see, and if you're out there being you instead of sitting in your apt drinking wine and watching tv, your soul mate is going to have an easier time finding you. Don't you agree?
I just think that being single and catching a man (or woman) shouldn't be our number one goal, and shouldn't be our prime focus.
What are you doing for you?
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You're quite right that a very narrow idea of romantic relationship is touted as the single greatest goal in a lot of media, when really there are lots of other important things. So long as you're doing something productive, finding someone needn't be a priority.
ReplyDeleteAlso, if we're focused on being productive, we'll be less likely to jump at underwhelming relationships just to be in one.
Of course, it is difficult to maintain this mindset when most media is determined to idealize romantic endings. Then again, that likely sells better, too; it's a cycle, I tell you.
Indeed it is.
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